Cannot

Although I wanted to do my second workout yesterday, it just didn't work out due to time. I thought for sure I could go today. Cannot. Not that you want to know this, but I've just spent the last 10 hours being sicker than I can remember. And yes, the throwing up, etc. My neice got it the night before last and even though we banned her from our house, I didn't think about the fact that she had been over here a few days prior. What a misreable experience. The good news is that after about 3am onward my stomach stopped hurting and I stopped throwing up. Unfortunately now, my mom has it. I hope she is okay. I know it hits older people much harder.

No working out or eating will occur today. Hopefully I'll be okay after today.

Christmas Day, W2W2

I find all this fascinating. I did the exact same thing I did the day before yesterday, but look at the stats comparison (today is on the left side):

Max hr: 172 vs. 177
Avg hr: 134 vs. 145
Distance: 1.90 miles (no change)
Calories: 184 vs. 181
In zone: 21:09 vs. 18:20

This feels like improvement, but I am kind of surprised to be able to see it like this. It's encouraging.

Running on Christmas Day before Christmas lunch was a good idea. I am pretty sure I will eat less because I am motivated/inspired. The scale helped today too - 120.2. That's the lowest I've seen in a very long while. When I started grad school in 2006 I was 116 so I am getting close to that.

Sarah got a new bike this morning so we will be going for a ride after lunch too. Should be a good fitness day.

Fairly Easy Day

I think one of the things the hrm is going to do for me is keep me honest. I just did one of the 30 minute preset programs on my treadmill that I think is relatively challenging...but the hrm seems to disagree. Here are the stats:

Max hr: 143
Avg hr: 120
Distance: 1.72 miles
Calories: 151
Total time: 30:00
In zone: 17:44

It was yelling at me again but this time because I was out of the range the other way. I need to keep researching though. I'm not sure this was a bad workout for me. I think I might like my average hr to be a little bit higher than that on days I don't run, but probably not too much higher.

Tomorrow is a run, but on Friday I'll do this other preset that kills me. Curious to see what my stats will be on that.

Now on to bake pies. Seriously. I am going to try to practice a smidgeon of self control tomorrow though. We'll see.

Merry Christmas!

W1W1

it has begun.

i finally made it to the gym tonight. and surprisingly, my mom came with me. i've been trying to get my mom to start going to the gym, with little luck. there is a ginormous baptist church within 2 minutes of my parents house. it also has a gym, so that it's members can grow both "physically and spiritually". but tonight she concented to go because she was sad i was going by myself. whatever works . . .

it wasn't too bad for the first workout. i didn't use the machines or anything because i knew my mom would want to leave after 30 minutes. not counting the warmup/cooldown i walked at 3.5 and ran at 5. it felt pretty good although i was a little tired at the end. looking forward to more! i think i will try to do more than the 3x a week prescribed by c25k. since my cardiac aptitude is so poor right now, i think it wouldn't hurt to repeat the workout once or twice more during the week. we'll see though.

i wasn't wearing my watch, but here are the basic stats:

time: 30 minutes
distance: 1.85 miles
max hr: 182

Week 2, Workout 1. That was interesting.

Okay, first of all, I did it. I didn't end up on the treadmill until almost 10:00 tonight. Didn't sleep last night, so that nixes morning run. Had lunch plans so that nixes lunch run. Left work and drove to Round Rock to pick up Sarah and her stepsister. From there to Whole Foods, from there to Allan's to pick up a plant (Christmas stuff, whatever), from there to home, where I cooked dinner for the next hour (and it was damn good). Dinner at 8:00, then dishes, then wrapped the few remaining gifts. Then sit for a second because my feet hurt from being in heels all day. And then, the run. But I digress.

So yes, that was harder. And I wore my heart rate monitor for the first time which was interesting. It kept yelling at me and I'm not completely sure why. I think it was saying - FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SLOW DOWN BEFORE YOU HAVE A HEART ATTACK WOMAN! Here are the stats, although I really don't know what any of it means yet:

Duration: 31 minutes 25 seconds
In zone: 18:20
Average heart rate: 145
Max heart rate: 177
Calories: 181
Distance: 1.90 miles

So workout 2 will be on Christmas Day, which is fine. That will keep me from drinking too much. Unless of course I run in the morning. Which I probably should. So the good thing about jogging for a minute and half and walking for two minutes is that it feels like it gets done faster because you are knocking it out in bigger chunks.

Tomorrow I will minimally do 30 minutes of walking on the treadmill, and ideally I will do a little bit of strength stuff too because I'm not working out with Lauren again until next Monday. Maybe some lunges and squats, push ups, etc. Homework is to figure out the heart rate monitor business.

Peace out.

Week 1 Done

I did Week 1 Workout 3 today so I guess I've kind of graduated. And I celebrated by cooking. Chicken and biscuits (chicken pot pie, basically), parmesan mashed potatoes, and asparagus. And of course wine. And maybe a little brownie/cookie dessert. (and yeah, it was brownie/cookie. It was cookies baked on top of a brownie. Really.) I think I may skip the scale tomorrow morning.

So it all goes right back to eating. The exercise I'm kind of digging. But I love the cook and sorry but F cooking healthy. It's no fun! So I think...I've got to seriously work on portion size. And I can cook this stuff...but I can't eat very much of it.

I've been relatively serious about this fitness thing for a week now and the scale has gone...up. What is that? I can't be eating MORE...and I've definitely been exercising more...so what gives? I probably need to not weigh every day because I know the whole water weight thing etc., but I am full on addicted to the scale. So perhaps I just need to try to keep a good perspective on the whole thing.

Meanwhile, all the cooking was really for Allan, the not boyfriend. But that's a whole other issue. Judah, it's the guy you met way back when. I refuse to let it end for some silly reason that I probably need my therapist for.

I'm hungry.

I've learned numerous times that it's 80% diet when the goal is to lose weight. And I really hate that because I really love food. So, I don't do anything unhealthy or bad to my bod but I have found that if I just stay a little bit hungry...the weight comes off.

Today I worked out an hour with my old trainer George. It was tough but satisfying. I try to do fairly intense strength training once a week. I usually work out with my friend Lauren. She does the super slow thing. We do incredibly heavy weight at a very slow pace. The point is to get to muscle failure because you build muscle mass by tearing down the muscles that way. Muscle at rest burns more calories than fat, my legs look great, etc. It is absolutely brutal but I have seen great results. I am in the best shape I've probably ever been in, yet I still have some extra weight on me...hence the Couch to 5k deal.

Tomorrow I'll do Week 1 Workout 3. It hasn't been bad but I am going so so slow. I'm not even sure what I do counts as jogging. But I read a lot and the biggest mistake beginner runners make seems to be not starting slow enough. I have taken that to heart. I may end up repeating this week. We'll see how the first Week 2 workout goes.

So, my goal is to get back to 115 lbs, which is a good weight for me. This morning I weighed in at 121.6. And no, I don't think you guys have to post your weight if you don't want to! I gained a TON of weight this summer - got up to about 130+ which is really heavy for me. I got home from 2 weeks in China HUNGRY and proceeded to eat mexican food for 2 months straight and one day my clothes didn't fit. It really was just like that. I've dropped a lot of that but have a ways to go. Hence to 5k in the spring. I think that will do it.

I ordered a heart rate monitor...very excited to get that so I can manage my arrhythmia which will make this a little more pleasant.

For the record, I hate running. I think it is too much wear and tear on the body and walking is much better for you. But the fact of the matter is that I am antsy to shed this weight and I think this is the answer.

Thus ends Clare's first post.

Project Europe

I'm over here for the next 6 weeks . . . follow my adventures misadventures!

Post #27

i walked hazel yesterday. it was nice. and then i did a little rowing. it really was "a little" rowing - only 8.30 minutes. someone came to the door and interrupted me and then i never went back to it. it was a friend coming by to introduce me to her dog. she has a 9 month old lab - 85 lbs. a sweet, black lab with the softest, most velvety ears you've ever felt. she was fairly calm. hazel did not like her for some reason. i think she detected an air of alpha on her and opposed it as the ruler of our domain. my docile, sweet lamb chop actually aggressed on the visiting dog, using the scary bark typically reserved only for the mailman. i thought she was going to attack her. it was slightly embarrassing.

Sidebar: Pride Street Blast 2008!

Okay, so up until tonight I had never been to a Pride event of any kind. I know, shameful! I was invited to go to the Street Blast with a few friends. For those of you not in the know, the Street Blast is the event held on Friday night – the first night of the festival – where the 18th block of Main Street is shut down so that house music can be broadcasted at ear splitting volumes. Come on, you know it sounds like fun!

In the days leading up to Pride weekend I have felt very ambivalent and apathetic about going. Internet, I know! It seems awful of me not to go in support of our people, but I detest Tootsies as a general rule, with its poorly lit, dingy interior and its nondescript house music. The.Street.Blast! sounded like an outside version of Tootsies. But in the name of research, I decide to go. I wonder what kind of drama will unfold tonight. Think of all those ex’s contained in such close quarters! There are a few people that I do.not.want to run into myself.

Two things I’m looking forward to:

1. Seeing large qualities of gay people. This is something I don’t often get to witness. I’ve really only ever seen as many gay people that can fit inside Tootsies. And since I don’t go to Tootsies anymore, I rarely see our people en masse.
2. The unfettered public groping. You know, the kind of groping that we gays never get to do in public normally? Yeah, that kind.

As a general note, it was troubling to witness the number of people who brought their small children and infants to the event. Who does this??!! Infants. Like four week old babies. Right up near the stage. Next to the very loud house music playing. Poor babies. Look at the child in this picture. This was one of the older ones that I saw. Look how sad and tired she is. Meanwhile, her father chats on a cell phone.

5:00pm – Jay, Dena and I meet in the parking lot across the street from Tootsies. The Street Blast is still an hour away from its scheduled start. For the most part, it looks fairly empty, with the exception of some people setting up. We amble over to Manny’s for some pre-SB chow.

[sidebar: I’ve been to Manny’s a number of times. I’ve never realized its proximity to Tootsies. I’m now momentarily disoriented]

5:06pm – (methinks) OMG, WHY is it so HOT? Summer can be so unfeeling and inconsiderate sometimes, no?

6:00pm – We walk back to the closed off block that is now, officially! The.Street.Blast! It still looks empty. I’m slightly disappointed. We decide to “walk around”. You know, check out the scene.

6:02pm – That was thrilling. It took roughly two minutes to walk the length of the block. And really, there is nothing to see with the exception of what appears to be a single, oddly placed, carnival-like booth where you can throw darts at balloons tacked to a wall to win a stuffed animal, some of which were quite large. A word about the stuffed! animals! They were rough looking. From further away the largest of the stuffed animals compel thoughts of a wonderfully plush, parental surrogate. Up close they look tattered and worn. And unloved.

6:10pm – We all file into Tootsies so that I can use the bathroom. Sure, there is an entire row of porta-potties available for use, but I want to use a real bathroom. Wait. Let’s remember where we are. Tootsies and “real bathroom” are not synonymous. Anyone who has ever used the bathroom at Tootsies knows that it is only a half step above an outhouse; however, it did seem better than the alternative.

[rant] It astounds me that Tootsies has been in business as long as it has, making as much money as I’m sure it does and still offers a sub par bathroom experience. Namely, shower curtains in lieu of bathroom doors and what must be the smallest sink known to man. I first went to Tootsies in 2000 and they had shower curtains in the bathroom then. On a slow night you might find soap in the dispenser, paper towels and toilet paper. The perfect bathroom trifecta! On a busy night, forget about soap and paper towels - you’ll be lucky if there’s toilet paper to be had. The only truly lesbian bar in town and this is what my people are subjected to. [/rant]

I digress . . .

There is a $2 cover at the door, which, even though it’s usually $5, seems like profiteering in view of the happy occasion (Pride! 2008!); however, we were thankful we paid the usage tax later because we didn’t have to wait in line to get back in. Now, it’s been quite some time since I last frequented Tootsies. Some subtle changes have occurred, mainly in the form of signage. Shortly after walking in the door you are assaulted with excessive signage and then again at the “bathrooms”. The signs at the entryway read: “OVER 21 ONLY” and “MUST HAVE TWO FORMS OF ID, ONE WITH A PICTURE”, which I guess they had suspended for Pride! 2008! since my driver’s license alone is accepted. I say assaulted because the signs are written in all caps. Internet, if you have taught us anything it’s that all caps is not used for emphasis, it’s used for yelling. Bad form.

[sidebar: who goes to a bar with two forms of ID? I don’t even possess two forms of ID unless you count my passport (which is expired anyway). So I’m supposed to show up next time with my driver’s license and birth certificate??]

The second set of signs (I counted two or three) near the bathrooms, yell out “WOMEN ONLY!!!!!” This is obviously a product of the rape allegations that were leveled against Tootsies in April.

[sidebar: I think if a man (and there are many that frequent Tootsies), has the intent to harm and/or rape a woman, a sign proclaiming “WOMEN ONLY” (even if it is in all caps) is not going to serve as a deterrent. Neither are the shower-curtain bathroom doors. Shower curtains don’t lock.]

Finally, there are a few signs at the bar that yell “TWO DRINK MINIMUM”. This is all beginning to feel very Shawshank-like.

6:18pm – We go over to buy our drink tickets. I am aware that you are required to wear an arm band signifying your eligibility to consume alcoholic beverages. What I did not know was that you had to pay $5 for that arm band. Again, seems like profiteering. Also, each day of the festival uses a different colored arm band, meaning you have to re-buy an arm band each day that you want to drink. Jay and I attempt to negotiate and/or argue this injustice, ultimately in vain. We are bitter.

There are few drink options available: water, sodas, some bottled beers and the very exotic sounding “mixed” drinks with alluring names like: twisted tea, Malibu mango lemonade and Stoli blackberry lemonade. Unfortunately, we quickly realize that the “mixed” drinks were mixed . . . in large orange coolers. Like the ones that you used to drink out of at your old soccer games? Yes, those.

[sidebar: Think back to the early 80’s - do you remember that orange drink from McDonalds? It wasn’t carbonated – it was just orange drink. I had it everywhere as a child: at soccer games, at church events, at large family functions . . .]

Jay, a self-confessed germ-o-probe, took one look at the orange coolers and ordered a Miller Lite. I followed suit.

6:30pm – I think the dart game might be fixed. At least that is what Jay proclaims after trying her luck. She pierces enough balloons only to qualify for a stuffed animal from the lowest tier; however, the fast talking “carnie” attempts to dupe her into spending just.$15.more! to upgrade to the surrogate size stuffed animal. She isn’t biting. And she is incensed.

We decide to sit up by the stage (and the very large speakers) on one of the curbs and people watch. The sun has not yet set and is beating down on me from directly over the buildings on the West side of the street. We see the first infant of the night. Here’s something else troubling, although I feel kind of bad for pointing it out. We people watched for over an hour. We saw lots of people – our people. In a word, they looked rough. Like 95% of the people that walked by looked unemployable. And sort of mean. Jay agrees. I start out the conversation like this: “Can I say something kind of rude”? (Jay) “Of course”! I console myself with the thought that it is still pretty early as I wonder aloud which section of The.Street.Blast! contains the professional, employed over-thirty crowd? It was apparently not the section we are sitting in.

8:05pm – (Jay) “Look they’re walking”! Her statement doesn’t register with me at all. My eyes have glazed over by this time. It isn’t until I notice the group of people that have formed two parallel facing single-file lines that I ask what is going on. This is when I learn of the phenomenon that is cat walking. Have you heard of this? It’s where the boys and trans-gendered walk – to pulsing house music – like they are walking down a runway. Complete with all the hip shaking, hair flipping, posturing and associated flair/pizzazz you would expect from any runway model. Apparently, it’s all the rage amongst the trans-gendered community. It’s all taken very seriously and such, with organized practices and everything.

I am fascinated.

8:56pm – Crowd is getting much thicker now. By this time we are down at the South end of Street.Blast.2008! where the previously talk-prohibiting house music was now just a non-descript “thumpa-thumpa” sound. You know the sound. It’s the background music in every Babylon scene from the defunct Queer as Folk.

9:30pm - No soap in bathroom at Tootsies. What a surprise . . . As I’m walking through that smaller room that leads to the bathroom, I hear two Pride Staff people talking about how there should always be someone watching the liquor and that there had not been. I look and sure enough, against the wall is what looks to be twenty cases of bottled liquor. I’d never seen it there before. It was obviously Street Blast overflow. I’ll come back to this in a moment . . .

9:50pm - I just ate a funnel cake. O Supreme Goodness! Seriously. Have you had one of these lately? Amazing! I was curious as to how such a thing could come into being. It’s a fascinating process.

First you pour some batter into a cookie cutter like thing sitting in a vat of grease.

Then, after the prescribed amount if time, shake the new funnel out of the cookie cutter thing into vat of grease.

New funnel should float around in vat of grease for a prescribed amount of time.

Pluck new funnel from vat of grease and place on paper plate. Sprinkle powdered sugar liberally. And viola! There you have it! A little grease endowed slice of heaven right here on earth. Seriously, if I could begin each day with a funnel cake I would.

10:02pm – The crowd is growing bigger by the minute. At this point it’s getting harder and harder to move around. As a result, there is a lot of standing around and crowd watching.

These ladies graciously agreed to pose for me. I loved their outfits. They even had matching carry-on luggage that they pulled around behind them (on wheels of course).

Not pictured is the tight fitting mankini that this guy is wearing. I was sad it didn’t make it into the picture.

10:28pm – All is not well. It’s really too early to tell but it appears as if my intestinal tract is rejecting the funnel cake offering – say it isn’t so!

10:30pm – I make my way to the bathroom to check out the disturbance. By this point, there is a hella line to the bathroom, extending all the way to the pool table. Well of course there is. And then I notice what all the cases of liquor are for. It’s the site of the mixing station for the exotic “mixed” drinks! Up walks a Staffer with an empty orange cooler. He dumps in the prescribed ingredients, gives it a stir or two and then heads back out to the street with it. Not exactly the cleanest of environments. What isn’t pictured is the half full ashtray sitting just feet away from the mixing station. Lovely. I finally get through the line into the bathroom to see that not only are their no paper towels but the soap is gone too. Well what was I expecting? It is a busy night after all – Street.Blast.2008!

11:10pm – There is now a large mass of people in front of the stage. We decide to see for ourselves what is going on up there. As we make our way up front, past the throng of people, I realize that the non-descript thumping I have been listening to for the last few hours is actually music! Martha Washington is on stage singing.

11:22pm – The crowd is dutifully whipped into a frenzy at last call with “It’s raining men”. I’m talking, hands in the air, crowd-jumping frenzy. Can you think of a more apt way to end The.Street.Blast?

11:30pm – The.Street.Blast! is ending. We are standing in a disturbingly long line to get into Tootsies. And here is where our previously paid $2 cover pays off. We are able to move to the front of the line. Otherwise, we never would have made it in. Here’s a question you may be asking yourselves: why was I standing in line for Tootsies when I so clearly detest it? Simple - a) I was a little drunk and b) the people I drove with wanted to go.

11:35pm – The smoking ban is definitely not in effect yet here. We are engulfed by the familiar cloud of smoke. Tootsies is filled to capacity!

11:50pm – There is a woman sitting on one of the black leather couches passed out, with a pitcher of beer in her hand. We sit on one of the empty black couches and observe the action.

11:55pm – (me) “I've seen surprisingly little PDA tonight”. (Jay) “Yeah, because it’s mainly singles here now. All the couples have gone home to do it”.

12:01am – (me, as I observe a couple embracing) “Why would a straight couple come to Pride and Tootsies? (Jay) OMG, you can't tell that is two girls”? (me) “My bad”.

12:17am – (methinks) “Sure would be nice to have a nice, warm girl to cuddle up to on this black leather couch”. This kind of sentiment is a sure indicator that it’s probably time to head for the exits.
12:24am – A guy next to us looks for his shirt, which I had inadvertently been sitting on. He spies an unused condom on the floor (which, is kinda gross if you think about it). Jay encourages him to put it to good use. His response: “I don't need a mag! I want to blow it up like a balloon)! Which he then proceeds to do.

12:41am – One last stop to the bathroom yields the unexpected surprise – the soap and paper towels have been restocked!

12:45am – (overheard in bathroom) “It’s hot as balls in here”! (and it was) and “damn it woman, I’m going to do you before we leave”. My chest swells with pride. My people! At this point we decide that we’ve seen everything that we’re going to see and we head out to Chubby’s to end the night.

1:14am - At Chubby’s. Is packed. Had to wait for a table.

2:22am – As we’re leaving Chubby’s we hear this little gem: “I'll just tell the MF bitches that my motorcycle is an extension of my MF dick”.

2:35am – Back home, reflecting on a most interesting evening. Am I glad that I went? Yes, yes I am.

Week 1 - W1

i have received some compelling feedback from a long time reader regarding the 'sidebar' to 'workout' ration - that it's a little out of whack. in response i say, enough with all the silly sidebars! onto the workout portion of this blog!

before going to the gym today i strapped on my polar heart rate strap. first thought i had upon snapping it closed: "sweet jesus! why is it so tight??!!" i winced from the pain. and then i sighed. surely i couldn't have gained that much weight could i? though i had slacked for almost an entire year, fortunately i really hadn't gained any weight at all - at least that is what the scale tells me. why.wasn't.this.fitting? ah, yes. joyous revelation! i remembered that the ex had come by a few weeks prior and randomly wanted to check her heart rate. she had obviously made the strap smaller.

first day back at the gym. i've decided that i'm going to train to run a 5k. i'm using jeff galloway's 5k training plan, which at 15 weeks, is excessively long. most marathon training plans are 12 weeks if that gives you any indication. anyway. my weak and feeble core needs 15 weeks to prepare itself to run those three miles. if i learned anything from the Amy Thompson run it is this: time is my friend. and discipline. oh, and also overall dedication. The training plan is comprised of three run days and three cross training days. On the run days i've decided to also work out on the weight machines.

i have a 'workout person' that i typically meet at the gym. she's 25. she's also bouncy and happy and peppy. all things that i am not. i don't think anyone could or would call me bouncy. but my person, she's a good one to have around.

after running on the treadmill (for clarity i'm going to say 'run' even though we all know it's mostly 'walking' at this point) i worked on the weight machines. i was sweating profusely as well as exerting a great deal of energy. i look up at one point to see my person reclining on the adductor machine, casually reading a magazine. she loves the abductor/adductor machines.

me: dude! you're not laying out by the pool!
person: [looks up and giggles]
me: if you're able to read a magazine then you don't have enough weight on
person: [more giggling]

1. Run
Energy Expenditure: 278 kcal
Average Heart Rate: 152 bpm
Maximum Heart Rate: 186 bpm
Distance: 1.5 miles
Time: 24:50min

2. Weights
Energy Expenditure: 500 kcal
Average Heart Rate: 152 bpm
Maximum Heart Rate: 171 bpm
Time: 45min

incline press: 60
chest: 40
shoulder press: 30
lat pulldown: 60
seated row: 45
bicep curl: 20
seated tricep extension: 30
abductor: 60
adductor: 60
seated leg curl: 50
leg extension:40
leg press: 120

Sidebar: Leg

while drinking a glass of water last night i noticed, at the bottom of my glass, what looked suspiciously like the severed leg of some creature. i immediately poured out the remaining water, including the leg, into the sink. it wasn't until this morning that i became troubled. has something tainted my ice maker container? say it isn't so . . .

Race Redux: Amy Thompson Run for Daylight

i completed my first race on memorial day. in short, i got schooled . . . by children.

it was a humbling affair.

there were two events: the 8k and the 2 mile. i decided on the 2 mile because i wasn't sure i could finish the 8k within the time limit. and really, it was just 2 miles. i walk 2 miles all the time. well, not recently, but still. 2 miles. 2 miles is easy! i bet i could even run half of it! it's only two miles. i mean really, if i had to, i'm sure i could run three miles. this was the debate that i got into with mary and ann last summer - that if i had to, i could run three miles. like, had to as in if someone was chasing me because they wanted to kill me. we argued about it all summer long - whether or not this was possible in my current state. i maintained that it was.

i digress . . .

the 2 mile was billed as the event for all! ages! what i failed to realize when i signed up was that it really was for all ages. like small children. they were numerous. and they were fast.

i started out running until i couldn't run any further. i prefer to think of this as pacing myself. then i walked as fast as i could until i caught my breath (and the cramp in my side subsided). lots of people passed me. lots. here are just a few of the people who passed me:

- small children
- a woman pushing a stroller
- a man carrying a child on his back
- the elderly
- two girls holding hands and skipping
- people who looked way more out of shape than me

i continued alternating running with fast walking until . . . wait . . . is that the finish line? i was overjoyed. that is until someone beside me called out ONE MILE! and then i saw with my own eyes the tape on the street delineating the one mile mark. sweet jesus! i was crushed. how can i only have gone ONE MILE? it felt like i had been running for 30 minutes. and i was only half done.

i pressed on as fast as i could, while the masses effortlessly passed me. when i got to the actual finish line i saw mary, ann, tim and hazel cheering me on. my spirits lifted slightly. i ran the last little stretch to the finish. i finished in 30:05, which isn't as good as i had hoped, but it certainly could have been worse.

and afterwards my body hurt like a mother - why, i have no idea. i think it must have been the shock of running on the pavement. i think i could have gotten the same time with much less pain had i just walked fast.

after i had consumed my post race cookies (the second cookie was really ill-advised) and water i sheepishly admitted to mary and ann: "okay, maybe i couldn't run three miles if i had to". they reveled in my admission.

Sidebar: Oatmeal

oatmeal . . . what a curious thing.

i'm going to confess something that will compel you to ask yourselves "how is this possible"?

i ate oatmeal today . . . for the first time . . . ever!

i know, i know, it's hard to believe. but see, you must understand something. i have a few tactile-based idiosyncrasies, one of which is wet food. i eat my cereal dry - with no milk. i have no issue with milk in itself, but more so with way that it makes my cereal wet and invariably soggy. and so obviously, the same thing applies with oatmeal.

how have i lived 35 years without ever having consumed it? easy . . . anytime oatmeal was offered to me a myriad of other breakfast items was also offered, including cereal and more importantly bacon and eggs!

it was surprisingly easy to make - mix one packet instant low sugar (maple and brown sugar) oatmeal with 1/2 cup hot water. i suppose i can proclaim it fairly palatable. i may need to experiment with the water to oatmeal ratio and possibly use hotter water. i did find the pasty, soggy consistency to be a little disconcerting, but i pushed past that. after all, they eat it all the time on biggest loser, don't they?

I'm Back Bitches!

on the one year anniversary of my absence i would like to just say - i'm back bitches! i declare project jaguar to be reinitiated!

Week 10

post 1:
last night i ran 1.5 minutes instead of just 1 minute on the run part. i know it's no big deal but it was alot to me. i was able to do it although my heart rate did get up to 180 near the end. my left shin started bothering me after 30 min so i went back down to 1 minute. not sure what was up with that. it wasn't sore afterwards. baby steps . . .

Total Time: 77 min
Total Kcal: 7811

post 2:
so i swam for the first time in probably 20 years tonight. it. was not. pretty. not for the lifeguards watching, nor the parents observing, nor the children playing. flailing and thrashing about is an understatement. i knew it was going to be hard but was suprised at just how difficult it was. god! how did i ever swim as a child? i couldn't get enough air when turning my head so by the time i got 3/4th of the way down the length i was completely out of breath. my arms, which seemed to start out so strong from the wall, by the middle of the lane were just splashing around ineffectively. my back end seemed to disappear under the water. i had to stop for a minute or so after completing each length to catch my breath and mentally prepare myself to continue. also, right after starting and somewhere in the middle i felt light headed and a little disoriented. strange. when i got home i went online to read up on freestyle and i was very surprised about all what goes into it. it's actually very complicated to get right. i had no idea it was so difficult. i'm going to get some private lessons from the YMCA next week. i figure it's better to do this sooner than later.

my upper body is sore today, specifically my shoulders. feels like i wrenched one of them. sigh.

what i saw: on my way out i asked the girl at the desk what the length of the pool was. i thought it was 25 yards but i wanted to make sure. it didn't seem to be marked anywhere.

me: what is the length of the pool?
her: ummmm . . . 25 . . . either meters or liters
me: i'm pretty sure it's not liters
her: oh, haahahaha yeah right . . . meters then. i knew it was 25 something.

Week 9

when i got to the gym i decided to do my main running/walking with hazel so i just walked for 20 minutes. again, still breaking in the orthotics so i'm trying to take it easy. because of the walking though, my hr didn't get very high so then i didn't burn as many calories while lifting. that is a bummer. however, if i had done the 1 min / 4 min run to walk then i'm sure it would have been high enough.

then hazel and i went on the trolley trail. it was really nice. i actually ran much faster on the run parts than i normally do - from 5.0 all the way to 5.8. i wasn't trying to run a certain speed - just going at the pace that felt good to me. on the way back, hazel was lagging on the run parts. i guess she was tired so i was only able to go 4.8, which felt very slow to me. i think i will try to go on the TT at least two or three times a week. hopefully hazel can get off her lazy ass and go faster soon.

Total Time: 1hr 56min
Total Kcal: 1078

Sidebar: Sidebar

so suddenly everyone is using sidebars . . .

Week 8

post 1:
today while on the treadmill i wanted to see how long i could run. i went 2 minutes. i know that is nothing to you runners but to me that was twice what i had been able to do. i felt like i could have done alot more. i tried to keep up the 2 min / 3 min run to walk cycle, but then my calves started getting sore. then i decided maybe i should just walk since a) it was my first time back in almost 2 weeks and b) i really haven't broken in the orthotics yet.

strangely, the distance and speed on the polar was almost completely accurate while wearing the orthotics. why would that be? without them it was a tenth of a mile or more off in distance and .2 mph off each time.

Total Time: 72 min
Total Kcal: 788

post 2:
me and a friend took hazel to SMP so that she could swim in the lake and frolick with other dogs. we went about 6pm and strangely, there was hardly anyone there. it was perfect weather. i prefer it with less dogs. the more dogs there are, the more chance there will be a redneck dog that might start something. as we were walking to the lake we passed a rott on a leash. it jumped at hazel and almost started attacking her. thankfully, the dog's owner grabbed him by the collar as we approached so she was able to restrain the dog. it scared me a little. then the owner said "yeah, sometimes he isn't very nice when he first meets a dog." dude! don't freaking bring your dumb antisocial dog to the dog park then!after playing at the lake for awhile, we went walking on the trails for an hour. this was all part of the off leash area so hazel was able to bound around free. i had no idea there were so many off leash trails. it was fun.

Sidebar: My Dumb Back

no workout tonight. my back is bothering me. it was fine all day but around six when i went over to check on jill's cat phoebe, i noticed it was aching. if it stays like this i'll be fine. hopefully its just a wierd pulled muscle or something minor and not a kidney stone that i'm unknowingly passing. i have had a stone in my kidney for the past two years. it just hangs out in there.